And out of the cocoon of sadness, emerged a butterfly

May 18

The weekend after Downtown Edition launched (5/1), I crashed HARD. I already knew the launch was happening a few days before ‘that time of the month’. So, already- I was going to be emotional. I worked so hard, energetically, creatively, pouring so much love into my online course that when it launched on Friday, I crashed. Like hard. I completely enjoyed every part of the process. I also set my mindset that I have already succeeded by putting my love and offering out into the world. Of connecting to more people, of sharing and encouraging creative expression.

But, I still crashed none-the-less. I was so depressed and it felt like I was saying “now what?”.

I had anticipated this, somewhat. I knew there was going to be a crash. After every one of my in-person day retreats that I host, I crash the day after. From opening up my energy, and offering up a safe place for everyone, I will energetically crash the day after and I allow myself to be a couch potato and to do nothing whatsoever. Thus, I had an idea that this was going to happen and probably be a bit bigger, due to this being a much bigger project. But, I didn’t think about it landing the week before ol’ FLO showed up. DOUBLE WHAMMY!

What’s a girl to do? Because I seriously could not think of anything I FELT like doing… to make me feel better. So, I went into the studio, lit a candle and started journaling and praying. And before you know it, I was pushing paint around. It helped enough that I felt like a walk outside with the dogs after. It was enough to get me through the day. From tears to the butterfly page I created below, it was enough.

And out of the cocoon of sadness, emerged a butterfly.

Today is a new day. Things are back in a healthy perspective. I remembered that this little workshop was only one of many brainchilds of mine that I will launch into the world. And I have more work to do.

Have you felt like this? What helps you to feel better during a big crash after a big creative launch?

If you’d like to sit in the quiet or just some music and create alongside me, check out the process video of my butterfly page here.